Adventures in Fantasy Football


I’ve never played Fantasy Football before. In fact, in my lecture last Friday, I had trouble coming up with a good example of “constructive criticism” a football coach would give to a player. I explained to my students that, even though I attended every football game in high school, I did so as a member of the band, and I generally brought a book along with me to read between performances.

While I have come to understand how football works and that guys don’t wear underoos under their uniforms, I can’t say that I am much of a fan. I didn’t watch NCAA football until I came to OU.

My being a part of a fantasy football league is interesting to say the least. My team name – The F Bombs. My league – The Burnt Cookies. My strategy – pick the people with the oddest names. I also cared about their health, mainly because the app I put on my iPad had that in ginormous letters when I pulled up the athlete and I didn’t understand any of the other numbers or abbreviations brought up. Health, I can understand.

My strategy has not worked terribly well and the thing hasn’t really started yet.

For one, I had chosen a running back who did not have a team. Oops.

Second, my tight end got dumped from his team. Oops again.

Both have been replaced.

I don’t know if any of my players start (I’ve been told that many of them don’t). I just know that I have one loyalty: Jerricho Cotchery. Why? I think he wins for oddest, most fun name. Will he even play? According to a blurb I just read, it is doubtful, unless someone gets injured.

Do my league-mates regret inviting me to play? Hmmm… maybe. In fairness, I disclosed my strategy to them ahead of time and they still let me play. Then again, I showed up for the draft, which put me ahead of other folks who might have taken the spot of The F Bombs.

And that is what matters.