I am hopeless when it comes to trying to maintain a sense of cool when it comes to anything related to dating. It is not that I am incapable of going with the flow or being laid-back. I am that way in many areas of my life. I try to be flexible and understanding. And I am continually trying to do as Saint Poehler has taught me and, “Practice Ambivalence.”

Much easier said than done when it comes to my love life (or lack thereof).

Case in point, my latest Tinder guy. Lots of Kik messages back and forth throughout the week. Then nothing all weekend. Having the lack of chill that I have, I find this shady as fuck.

Aziz gets it:

See also:

My other inclination is to think that I did something wrong, like unintentionally insulted his manhood or something. Not to get into details, but I asked a question about an unsolicited picture that was sent, he replied, and I said “Huh. Interesting.”

Not only has there been no response, but he has not read my messages either. At least I have a sense of restraint in terms of sending messages that go unread and unanswered.

And the thing is, I know I shouldn’t care. But I am uncool and do care. Unsolicited pictures aside, he seemed like an okay guy. I should probably note that my standards are such that I am impressed if a guy has a degree, a full-time job, no kids, a car, and lives by himself in an apartment or house. Oh, and no girlfriend or wife. Not being allergic to animals and not being a Republican are bonuses (especially the Republican part – that’s a deal breaker). Latest Tinder Guy passed all of those standards with flying colors. And I find him attractive.

So I read advice blogs about such situations that say, “You must chill” and “You never know what might have happened.”


For a woman who has “patience” tattooed on her wrist, I am severely lacking in it.

I am wondering, should latest Tinder guy choose to reply, what bullshit excuse he will provide. Or maybe I am just supposed to be sooooo cool that I shouldn’t expect one.


Edited to Add:

Cool unkept for sure. 

Messages bound to be unread have been sent. Not angry, more in the vein of “sorry I did not react with unbridled glee at receiving unsolicited picture.” I think he blocked me on Kik after the comment I made given what Kik says about delivered messages that go unread for a period of time. So the apologetic message was sent through Tinder and, just to cement my awkwardness, through Facebook. We’re not FB friends and he didn’t tell me his last name, but super sleuthing got to the best of me. At least the message is bound to be sent to a filter and friend requests can be quickly deleted (albeit still seen).

I can’t decide if I am grateful or regretful that Catfish has encouraged my super sleuthing skills. Obviously, it doesn’t keep me from being side-swiped (see Stippper Guy). 

Yeah… I’m going to be single forever. At least this means I’ll have my whole bed to myself and my pets. 

Edited to Add Again:

Latest Tinder Guy says he was just taking a break from his phone over the weekend. W. T. F.

Lord help me. I am not cut out for this shit.