Running Together

I’m talking to someone on Tinder that I once spoke with months ago, perhaps even over a year ago. The problem is — I can’t remember why it ended the first time. 

I don’t mean that in a “oh he’s so amazing, why did I ever left him go” sort of way. I mean that all these dudes are running together in my head. 

There’s the dude who kept sending me selfies on Bumble. Like, instead of emojis, he would send a picture if his face. He liked to golf. 

There’s the guy want to say I wanted to go on a date with him, but he was watching nephews or something and got pissy when the nephews left and I didn’t want to go out. Or something like that. (This might be linked with the dude above)
There’s the guy who works in sports media. He has popped up more than once. I’m pretty sure he uses way outdated pictures. In any case, he always wants to make out or hook up, generally in some random parking lot somewhere. He doesn’t even like the idea of us actually meeting and getting drinks first. 

There’s the guy who was too busy going to Cavs games to really have any sort of date with me. 

There’s a guy who has a broken hip. He is incredibly smart and I enjoy conversation, but he’s not very flirty. And he talks about his hip a lot. 

There’s a guy who is fairly tuned out of the conversation, but he said he wants to take me out. Or he did a week or so ago. He said he wanted to kiss me on New Years. 

There’s a guy from whom I receive about one sentence a day. Just a perpetual conversation. It’s not flirty. It is boring. 

There’s the guy who received my Kik username and said “Guess what I have for you” then sent me a picture of his dick… as he sat on the toilet, his pants obviously around his ankles. He had a cat, I think, and he lived alone. 

They all mishmash together eventually. And I’ll come off like an asshole if I’m like — are you the guy who sent a bunch of selfies and you play golf and stuff? 

I should note that this doesn’t happen with guys I actually go out on a date with. I have kept them straight, so far, I think. Crushes, though… they have congealed. 

For what it’s worth, I’m pretty sure this particular guy is the selfie guy. He already sent me two in the course of 2 hours. Blergh.