I've written about the Fourth of July here before. How I used to spend it on my grandparents' farm - back when they had a farm - and there would be a giant fireworks display. I did remember the movie I saw my first Fourth in Ohio - Magic Mike XXL. The theater was full [...]

Polyamory And Being Enough

This piece by Polly has me thinking.  We happen to be living in a moment when lots of young urbanites believe that open relationships are the way and the light. There’s this very common notion that sex always gets very old with the same person, and once that happens you’re fucked, so why not structure [...]


In a brief reprieve from my dating life (of lack thereof), allow me to talk about my cats.  This is not a euphemism.  I have two cats - Loki and Bartleby. They are both 13 years old.  I found Loki in 2004 outside of my parents' house. He was hiding out in the woods. Tiny [...]


My mom put my flower garden in nearly a year ago while I was recovering from my weight loss surgery.  I love my flower garden. Like my mom, I find gardening to be a form of self-care. I treasure being able to see the colors bloom. I love coming home at the end of the [...]

Profile Photos

I am of a mind to do new profile photos for my online dating profile.  The problem is getting someone to shoot pictures of me that are casually posed. That is, nothing that looks more appropriate for a high school senior shoot than something meant to attract men to date me.  Advice I've read online [...]

An Open Letter to Mama Becky

Dear Becky, I saw that you shared that long-ass Facebook post about our community: This was Boardman Sam's Club and Walmart. Another friend told me this happened in Marc's as well. ALL PARENTS/GRANDPARENTS NEED TO LISTEN UP. I have gone back and forth as to whether to post this or not. It makes me a [...]


I believe I've written before about my unabiding love of the advice column "Ask Polly." One of the things she often advises is that women cultivate their kickass lives and eventually someone will catch on and want to join their kickass lives. In her most recent column, she advises the reader to: "Get back in [...]

JNCO Jeans

For some reason, I brought up JNCO jeans in my Intro class this evening. I think I roughly tied it to privilege in that people who are of average height don't have to go out of their way for properly fitted pants. When students don't talk to me, I go off on tangents. This was [...]

On My Own

There's a song in Les Miserables in which Eponine is dreaming of walking next to her crush, Marius. They're in love and she sings about how her heart is empty when he is not around. It's called "On My Own." You could find it in heavy rotation on my iPod a long time ago. Not [...]


I considered what a future child of mine would be like and what I would be like as a parent today, y'all. It stems from my lecturing on my dissertation material, namely the involvement of parents in sex education.  Before we get into why this is an unusual occurrence, allow me to describe this child [...]